You
Know You're A Mother When:

-
You count the
sprinkles
on each child's cupcake to make sure they're equal.
-
Your child
throws up
and you catch it.
-
Someone else's
child
throws up at a party and you just keep eating.
-
You consider
Play-Dough
to be a controlled substance.
-
You hope ketchup
is
a vegetable, since it's the only one your child eats.
-
You can't bear
the thought
of your son's first girlfriend.
-
You hate the
thought
of his wife even more.
-
You hear your
mother's
voice coming out of you when you say, "Do you want me to come back
there?!?"
-
You stop
criticizing
the way your mother raised you.
-
You hire a
sitter because
you haven't been out with your husband in ages, then spend half the
night
checking on the kids.
-
You use your own
saliva
to clean your child's face.
-
You say at least
once
a day, "I'm not cut out for this job," but you know you wouldn't trade
it for anything.
- Diana Fuqua
(copied)